Standing in your truth is key when dealing with a bully. One thing I struggled with when I was younger was that I wouldn’t think of a comeback until after the incident had happened. I would freeze in shock. Now that I am older, I have learned to react immediately.
Quite often bullies are insecure. They usually see something in you that they will never ever have. Many of them lie. They may be envious of your gifts and want to tear you down and make a scene. The thing is, individuals who are accomplished and successful have usually worked very hard to get to where they are. Discipline, integrity, and results are connected.
I give immediate consequences to bullies. I do not give them my energy or time. They will have to look elsewhere to get power. I report their behavior and describe it exactly. Bullies are often insecure and in denial about their own problems. They could be addicts or alcoholics. Some are living a lie, afraid of admitting their true sexual preferences, or experiencing stressful financial problems. Their attacks on others, who are usually conscientious rule followers, give them a quick shot of adrenaline. POW!
Have you dealt with a bully in your life? What happened?
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As for bullies-I suffered the same school yard bullying as everybody did back in our youth. One of the great things about growing older is you realize you just don't care anymore what bullies think. Standing your ground and believing in what is right is so much easier as we mature. Wonderful pictures!
ReplyDeleteThanks, Anita. I like hearing your perspective.
DeleteI can hold my own these days, I am not easily bullied but there is far too much micro-aggression at work that is more difficult to call out because it is more subtle. My transgender daughter gets bullied a lot, sadly. It is difficult to stand up to bullies when you are different but I hope she learns to call it out without putting herself at risk of harm. I think life experience and maturity helps with such challenging behaviours.
ReplyDeleteI think so, too, Christina. I am sorry to hear what your daughter is experiencing. It takes courage to stand in your truth.
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