Age and the Dancer

One thing that I was never prepared for as a dancer was dealing with aging. Dancing keeps you young, and in my early forties I was very happy with my looks. I thought that as long as I stayed in shape, I would probably look the same.  Once I hit forty seven, however, I felt like I was slammed with challenges. All of a sudden I had decreased range of motion in my hip joints, (down to 20%). I also experienced  extreme stiffness, and I had trouble sleeping. At the time, I thought it was the aging process. Now, in retrospect, I see that it was osteoarthritis, which is very common in professional dancers. It progressed at an alarming rate. Since healing from my bilateral hip replacement surgery, I feel thirty years younger. My range of motion is much better. I no longer feel stiff or have aches and pains. I am able to easily sleep through the night. Many of my dancer friends had told me that they were pain free after their hip replacements. I found it hard to believe, but it has become true for me, as well.

In the rest of my life, several things had  hit me at once. My brother had suffered a massive stroke at 49 and had died. This was a shock to the entire family. He had always been athletic, handsome, and fit. He looked like he was in his mid thirties until the end. It's strange when someone dies, and they don't get old. He never looked wrinkled or elderly. We would always remember him young, like Princess Diana. A couple of years later, my mother died, after living for many years with health problems. I was prepared for her death, but it was still traumatic. Because she had been in pain before she died, I was relieved that she was no longer suffering. Still, I missed her, because we were close. The third whammie for me was finally seeing an orthopedic surgeon and finding out that I needed to have both hips replaced. Although both hips were bone on bone,  I had been in denial for years. My mother had been telling me that it was arthritis, but I didn't want to believe her. I thought I was too young for such an "old lady" disease. She was right.

Going through menopause was a learning experience. I was fortunate in that I didn't suffer from hot flashes or weight gain. I did notice a big difference in my skin, hair, and face after age fifty, though. I used to look at some of the over fifty female female choreographers I knew when I was young, and wonder why their hair was so wild and messy. Now I understood, because mine looked the same way. It had become  much dryer and stiffer than it was when I was younger. It also was becoming very, very grey. I continued to use henna, because when I would let the roots grow out, I felt like a hag. I just couldn't do it. I felt like I looked like I was in my seventies with grey hair. Some people could pull it off, especially men. For some reason, a lot of the guys I know look terrific with silver hair. My friend told me about a powder you can buy on Amazon to cover your roots. It's called Wow. I bought a box, and loved it.  I found that  had to leave the henna treatment on for four hours to cover the grey. It did the job, though. 

The thing that really surprised me was the drop in libido. I did some research, and wondered if it was low estrogen. I had friends who were on hormone replacement therapy, but that really wasn't what I wanted. I went back to practicing Kundalini Yoga, and that was an instant fix. Kundalini Yoga moves the energy from the base of the spine up to the top of the head. It gives a radiance to the skin and face, and really makes a person glow. I have been working on a set called Awakening the Ten Bodies of Light. I am amazed at the benefits and changes I feel. I like it because it is natural. Certain foods can really help, too. Some of my favorites are pineapple, beets, garlic, onions, and chili peppers. They act as natural aphrodisiacs.

I also noticed my eyesight becoming weaker, and my memory was suffering. I bought some reading glasses, and they did the trick for my eyes. As far as my memory, I realized that I could still take ballet classes, but that putting myself in a professional level class was really causing WAY too much stress. I would feel anxious about remembering the combinations, and sometimes I would blank out or make errors. It was very unlike me. I used to be a quick study. But, it was happening. I started taking classes that were not as advanced, and began to enjoy ballet again. You respond differently to stress as you get older, and in my case, I no longer put myself in situations that make me feel jumpy or upset. When I was younger I would  push myself very hard. I  forced myself  to learn all sorts of styles and methods quickly. Now I work more methodically and enjoy it. There's no rush. I don't have to hurry or force it. It's a relief  not be so stressed.