Home From Two More Senior Table Tennis Tournaments

 Last Saturday I competed in the Pasadena Senior Games.  This was my second year participating, and I won the Silver medal in Women 60-64 years of age.  I arrived early to watch some of the advanced women play in the 1:00 afternoon group.  They were formidable!  I was amazed at their skills and fierceness.  It was like being at the Olympics.  I soaked up the talent and electricity in the air.  

I was greeted enthusiastically by a few of the top players from my club.  Their warmth and support made a huge difference in my emotional state and gave me a sense of belonging.   They have so much dedication and experience.  Once it was my turn, Stacy Zhang, one of my favorite players,  patted my shoulders, said my name, and urged me into position.  It felt like I was part of their team, and reminded me of when I competed as a young gymnast.  LATTA has incredible players.  I hadn’t realized these ladies would be there; it felt like a tribe.  They have very high ratings.  Mine had started climbing, and it made me a bit nervous.

A couple women I met last year came up to me after the matches, expressing excitement and amazement over how much I had improved.  That was so kind and generous of them.  I started lessons last May, and my coaches Rudy Miranda and Tawny Banh have really worked me intensely.  It feels like an accelerated and highly creative pace.  They see your possibilities and natural gifts.  The personal game is a very individual design, like choreography.  You put in so many hours on and off the court, practicing, repeating, and refining.

I felt exhausted but relieved after the tournament.  The more I compete, the more I get to know people.  It’s a circuit.  I went right back to class the next day and then got some rest and chores done at home.  It takes time to recover.

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Winter Activities

 

Today the Newhall Community Center set up a festive table with cookies, candy canes, and devil’s food cupcakes,  They offered steaming coffee and hot chocolate.  It was beautifully done, and very thoughtful.

The women who work there went to a lot of work decorating the gymnasium where we play table tennis.  They did a lovely job.  I thought it was very touching.

I have been making some hearty meals this time of year.  Above was a dinner of pork chops and skillet Russet potatoes.   The days are short and the dogs and I feel very sleepy early in the evening.  I love this time of year.

How are things with you?

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Parents Who Demand Their Child Be the Best

 

When I was a young dancer, a mother of one of the girls who was from Japan used to glare at me with hatred when we passed in the halls.  I would smile and say hi to her, but she was a raging Tiger Mother.  Our teachers had given me a half scholarship and asked me to work as a teacher’s assistant each afternoon.  The money I made I used to pay for  my classes, pointe shoes, costumes and ballet seminars.  This woman felt her daughter should have been chosen for the opportunity.  She wasn’t.  I had natural teaching abilities that were evident at a very young age..  I was on the studio payroll at thirteen.  My father was impressed that the owner, Mr. Kirkpatrick, deducted social security taxes from my check each week.

Mrs. T. was livid, and she made no attempt to hide it.  She placed extreme pressure on her shy, quiet daughter.  The girl had natural talent, but lacked the drive, desire and confidence to excel.  To me, she seemed extremely obedient, submissive, and almost ashamed.  She looked down a lot, apologetically.

My dad used to tell my brothers and I,  “It’s not whether you win or lose, it’s how you play the game.”  That stayed with me.   In table tennis, if I improve and am able to apply what I learn under pressure, I am happy.  I have played with people from cultures who can’t bear to lose even one point to a woman who looks like me.  They react in a panic, and immediately lie, cheat, or order me to leave the table and play with someone from my own race.  This is the dark side of being a poor sport.  Many are experienced and adept cheaters.  In singing and dancing, you can’t fake what you do.  If you don’t hit the high C, the audience hears it.   If you are out of shape, you won’t be able to perform the choreography to a professional standard.

I am thankful now that I learned as a child to congratulate the winner,  not get upset by losses, and to develop the discipline to go back to class or practice the next day.

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Pick and Choose Wisely

 

When I was nineteen, dancing in my first production show, I was invited out after the second show by a male dancer who I greatly admired. He was gorgeous, funny, in incredible shape, and we got along well.  I was hopeful that this was the beginning of an exciting romance.

After eating a late dinner at a restaurant that he chose, he wanted to sit in the casino and gamble. I said I would watch.   We had just cashed our paychecks. I had mine mentally organized with the bills I needed to pay: rent, utilities, groceries, gas for the car, and my precious ballet classes.

As I sat next to him on a tall leather stool, I watched him gamble away his entire paycheck.  It made me feel sick to my stomach.  My energy deflated, I wondered how he was going to pay all of his bills.  The several hundred dollars he had earned had been eaten up eaten up by the machines over a few hours.  I was bored and exhausted.

So much for my hopes of a romantic evening and future with him.  It was quite a lesson.  As we walked out, he pointed of a picture of himself on the wall of the casino.  “See that,” he bragged.  “That’s me when I won $10,000.00.  It will happen again.”  He was flanked by two showgirls.  My heart sank.  I doubted it.

In spite of all he had going for him, he was self destructive.  These holes  grow larger as people age.    In retrospect, I am glad now that I learned of his addictions early on…I knew that lifestyle wouldn’t work for me.  

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Taking a Blogging Break

 Hi blogging friends.  I am taking a break from my blog, due to a very busy schedule.  Hope everyone is having a fabulous summer…I am!  Have met some exciting and talented people through table tennis, and am enjoying the challenging training.  Hope you are all staying fit, happy, and healthy!  Keep me posted on how you are doing…

A Joyous Time at the Pasadena Senior Games

 

This morning I played table tennis in Pasadena at The Senior Games.  I was going to wait a year to enter, but decided to just go for it.  My brother died of a stroke at 49, and tomorrow is not promised.  I decided to do it for the experience.

The woman in the above photo won Gold.  Her name is Bonnie, and she is Taiwanese.  She is a spectacular and highly trained player.   She was incredibly kind and patient with me.  “Stephenie, let’s take a photo together with our medals,” she suggested.  I was so touched.  I won Silver due to low enrollment.

I visualized winning a medal for weeks before the competition.  I thought it was funny that I won one by default, since I was way out of my league. That’s how visualization works, you begin with the end in mind.  

My goals were to stay in the game, return all the serves, make all of my serves without errors, and to keep the ball low.  I was able to reach those goals.  Getting in shape for the tournament took many hours of lessons, coaching, and practice.  

Bonnie’s doubles partner played like a confident star in the Men’s Singles.  After our match, he shouted out to me, “I can’t believe you’ve only been playing for three months!  You have big potential.”  That was such a thrilling compliment.  Another man told us that he couldn’t believe we were seniors.  Bonnie looks about seventeen, with long, firm legs.  In the above photo, I am practicing with a talented eighteen year old.

Fun times! So glad I didn’t chicken out…

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Are You Competitive?

 

When my dad was still alive, he went and played bridge at the bridge club every day. “I like the competition,” he told me.  I found that interesting, since he got along so well with everybody.  He still liked to win.  He would get discouraged when he didn’t play well.  Well into his eighties, he was still winning tournaments, and traveled around the Bay Area to attend them.

I think of him often when I am playing matches in table tennis.  I am not used to competing, because as a dancer, we all had the job.  It was more important to cooperate and work together.  There weren’t winners and losers. It has surprised me how people’s personalities can change once you start keeping score.  Some players’ eyes start blazing.

I am happy if I play well.  My main goal is to improve.  Staying calm, being a good sport, and learning how to keep score and break ties are what I’m working on right now.  I find that the masters stand quietly and surprise people with their ease of technique.  They don’t worry about mistakes.  They are non reactive.  Off the table training makes a huge difference, too.  Strength, agility, and speed can help make up for technical deficiencies, especially when competing with seniors.

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Structuring Your Days in Retirement

 As you can see, the woodpeckers still have plenty of acorns left in their stockpile.  I love how they prepare for the winter by meticulously  drilling holes in the Jeffrey Pine Trees.  There are still numerous acorns littering the ground, after the fire we experienced up in Wrightwood, California.

Having activities that you enjoy on your calendar makes time pass quickly and enjoyably in retirement.  I found the ping pong practicing I did last week with the robo machine greatly improved my performance at my most recent game.  My teammates noticed!  It’s exciting to improve at something you have a talent for, at any age.  This group of senior ping pong players is very passionate.  They are excellent!  It’s fun to watch.

This group of ladies enjoyed a recent live concert of Scott Joplin’s music with a 1920’s costume theme.  We all belted out the tunes in  the sing along, and jumped up and danced to some of the best songs.  My favorite was “When The Saints Go Marching In.”  

What is your weekly schedule like, as far as activities?  Do you attend any groups, play sports, or engage in fitness?  How does it benefit you?

Activities in Your Community For Seniors

 

This past week, I attended so many group activities, I felt like I was on a cruise ship!  There is a wealth of opportunities available.  I realized that people who move to assisted living could save a lot of money by keeping their residence and attending classes at senior centers, community centers, and online groups.  Prices at those places are very reasonable.

I know in my case, I am very attached to my home and garden, and  have no plans of selling and moving.    It takes time for fruit trees to mature and produce, rose bushes to spread out and develop, and  to make your house a reflection of your personality.

In the last seven days, I played ping pong at two different locations, went to a senior gym four times, met up with enthusiastic knitters at three different places, took a group singing class, and performed with the same over fifty-five group onstage.  The whirlwind was busy and exciting, but a little exhausting.  Next time I will pace myself.

Do you attend any group activities with friends?

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Healthy Routines for Seniors

 

During retirement, you have the whole day ahead of you to plan and seize.  You have time to go for a walk, to hike, cook nutritious and satisfying meals, or engage in your favorite hobbies.  Yoga before bed is my favorite routine.  It stops any numbness or tingling in the extremities for me.  It just requires commitment and effort.

This week, I am making my first loaf of sourdough bread.  initially,  it felt like too much work.  To my surprise,  I am enjoying the process of stirring the starter, replacing the plastic wrap on the glass bowl, and covering the project with a dish towel.  The wet, sticky dough is methodically bubbling and developing.  Tomorrow I will add the flour, knead the dough, let it rise, and bake it.  The anticipation and growth is very satisfying.  Bread is so ancient and universal.  It will be a treat to dip it in some extra virgin olive oil and salt.

I recently canceled my streaming service.  Instead, spending time gardening barefoot, knitting with groups and at home, and reading Barbra Streisand’s autobiography have become my new chosen  activities.   It is such a relief to choose healthy, talented company.  How are you using your free time?  Does it suit your needs, your soul and personality?

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Safe From the Los Angeles Fires

 

Thank you for your inquiries about my safety.  I have been fortunate, so far…the devastation is mind boggling.  I haven’t been able to blog because this disaster has made me feel sick.  Many of the dancers and dance teachers I worked with for decades have lost their homes and neighborhoods.  It is tragic.   None of us saw this coming.

 Knitting has helped me to ground and be productive.  I finished the pink socks.  I plan to gift them to my friend who lost her childhood home and current residence in Malibu.  I used to housesit for her parents, and the views and energy were breathtaking.

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Making Friends on a Tour or Cruise

 

On my last cruise, I made a few friends from both the pre-cruise tour and by being on the ship.  This woman lives in Florida, but she is from Puerto Rico.  She invited me to dinner with her in the specialty restaurants on three different nights. She is an avid cruiser, and a Platinum member.  The dinners were delicious, and we had wonderful conversations.   She told me she wouldn’t have gone on her own, and her gift certificates were for two.  It pays to be loyal to a cruise line.  We were on the Norwegian Prima.  I love this ship! 

We also ran into each other while waiting to board the bus back to the ship after one of the London tours.  We sat near The Tower of London Gift Shop and discussed our impressions of the city and its history.  I picked up some salted caramel biscuits to give to my friends who had me to dinner at their flat.

I loved this cafe with the rooftop garden in Norway.  It was right next to a lake.  We had lunch nearby with our tour group.  

The fjords were awe inspiring.  I absolutely loved the energy and incredible nature in Norway.  I definitely plan  to return.  

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Taking What You Learned on a European Vacation Home

 

Although we didn’t actually eat any pizza on my last trip to Italy, I did feel inspired to copy one of my favorite breads from a lovely restaurant around the corner from our bed and breakfast.  I dug up my favorite pizza recipe, refridgerated the dough overnight, and did my best to duplicate the olive oil and fresh rosemary bread.  It came out really well.  The chef in Umbria sprinkled coarse salt over the top, which added wonderful flavor and texture.  I’m pretty sure it was Mediterranean Sea salt. Ah!  

This was taken the night we ate dinner outside at the cooking school.  The woman next to me and I had just purchased new sun dresses at the local Farmers’ Market.  They were so reasonably priced!  They make such a nice souvenir.  I paired mine with one of my hand knitted shawls.  Our carefully prepared meal was absolutely divine!  I will never forget it.  We each received copies of the recipes.

These are some of the healthy and luscious grapes that were ripening on the vine at the winery.  Some of the ladies I traveled with ordered half a case of their favorite wine and had it sent home.  I walked through this area each morning, before breakfast.

These are some of the sweet children dressed up in their period costumes from the Medieval Festival that we attended.  They served us several courses of food and wine!  It was a fantastic evening, with hardly any tourists.

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Home From Italy!

 Hello Everyone!  I am sorry that I haven’t posted in so long…I was in Umbria, Italy, for a delightful week.  I spent the last week recovering from Covid.  I guess I got it on the long plane trip and lengthy layovers returning home.  All is well now.  The food, scenery, people and sights were out of this world!  

I was with a group of nine people.  We stayed together in an incredible villa out in the country.  The tiny village was surrounded by olive trees, vineyards, and lovely Italian gardens.  It felt like we were in a foreign film.  

I was able to take long walks in the mornings, before it got too hot.   This restaurant was just a five minute jaunt from our bed and breakfast.  They served us delightful lunches and dinners, as well.  The food was perfect and incredibly colorful and fresh. 

What an inspiring time and place!  How have you been?  I plan to catch up on all your blogs this week.  I hope you are enjoying your summer and look forward to hearing from you.

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Learning From Your Older Friends

 Since I was young, I have always enjoyed being around older people.  Many of my  friends  were decades older than me.  Now, a number of these people are experiencing falls, strokes, and health issues.  I listen to their challenges, observe their recoveries, and imagine what it is like to be in their shoes.    Sometimes what seems to me to be a solution is something they won’t consider.

We can learn from our parents as we watch how they age.  My mother stayed home with her dogs and enjoyed her house.  She was a very solitary individual..my father, on the other hand, had a wide social network.    He drove his friends to the bridge club every day, and regularly went out for drinks and meals with them.  He was very popular and well liked.  Both my parents were avid readers, and they enjoyed watching movies each night together.

The one area I really see that affects us as we age is self care.  Those who live a life of hard drinking, taking drugs, and engaging in high risk behavior often end up angry, and unpredictable socially.  They lash out at others for no apparent reason, become suspicious and paranoid,  and often die young. So much of it has to do with the personality.  Grandparents are often very aware of this; so are teachers.  

Whatever we do to our bodies over time accumulates.  Life takes a lot of self discipline and focus.  Daily habits become ingrained and solidify into our future.  The more in tune we are with our inner talents and life path, the better choices we can make in our relationships and career.  Not using our talents can cause extreme envy, rage and frustration.  Our gifts do not go away…our natural abilities are energy that needs to be used and expressed.  Otherwise we become tortured souls.

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The importance of Wise Adults in Children’s Lives

 

Recently I have been realizing how important it is for children to be exposed to adults who set an example of integrity, honesty, maturity  and happiness.   Ideally, this will be modeled by the parents, but that is not always the case, especially in today’s society.

When I first moved to LA, I was trained by dance teachers who were worldly, disciplined, artistic, sensitive and caring.  This had such a powerful influence on me.  We watched foreign films, listened to classical music and admired the ice skaters on PBS.  We cooked and ate together, and had meaningful conversations.  I knew I could trust them and depend on them.  They were consistent and kind.

I worry with the extreme trends in home schooling, living in remote areas, and protecting kids from the dangers of society that they may be far from the support they need to realize their potential.  Some children that  I know seem desperate for connection, especially with adult women.  I was fortunate to have many sources of feminine wisdom growing up: my Aunt Mary, my dance teachers, schoolteachers, friends’ moms, and neighbors.

Who were the wise adults in your life as you matured into a young adult?

Our family read a lot of books, and that exposed me to other cultures, people’s feelings, and ideas.  It was inspiring, entertaining, and developed our imaginations and vocabulary.  

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Recent Live Performances

 

Last Saturday I attended Westside Ballet’s Spring Gala in Santa Monica.  I met up with several old friends.   We all studied ballet together with Yvonne Mounsey and Rosemary Valaire.  The dancers onstage were phenomenal!  The crowd went wild.  It was thrilling.  There were numerous guest artists who made the evening absolutely magical.  Their performances were sponsored by several generous donors.

Cocktails and delicious snacks were served before the ballet.  The performance flew by, and then they presented  dinner and awards.  As you can see, we all were decked out in our best outfits.  The Broad Stage is a convenient commute for me.  The parking is easy,  close to the entrance, and free.

I greatly enjoyed Kenny James show and band on The Regatta.  Kenny was the Grand Champion for Star Search in the eighties.  He was on the show after Sam Harris won.    He really rocked the house with his Motown hits and sensational dancing.  He just emanates charisma!

Have you seen any live performances lately?

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Making Friends on an Oceania Cruise

 

My recent coastal cruise from Los Angeles to Vancouver was the first time I was onboard on the Oceania line.  It will certainly will not be my last, I loved it! The are known for their fine cuisine, and I was thoroughly impressed.  There were only five hundred people on the Regatta, our gorgeous vessel.

I stopped by my favorite Alpaca store in Juneau, Alaska.  I splurged on a red alpaca cape, and a white alpaca hat.  I wear the grey cape and rust hat that I purchased there in 2022 every day up in the mountains of Wrightwood..  I love the quality and style of these pieces.  They remind me of Old Hollywood.  The women who work there are very sweet and helpful.  

Catherine and I met on day one, and we hit it off immediately.  We enjoyed sitting together with her mom at some of our meals, played ping pong on the deck, and had several long, intimate conversations.  There was definitely a soul connection.  We have kept in touch, and plan to travel together again someday. 

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Suggestions for Seniors Traveling and Staying in a Hotel

 

On my recent trip to Las Vegas, I had a reservation at The Tahiti Village Resort.  I had purposely chosen a hotel on the south side of town to avoid traffic on I15 returning home to Los Angeles.  On a previous trip for a friend's birthday party, I sat in bumper to bumper traffic all the way from Mount Charleston to my home.  It took me almost six hours.  I didn't want to repeat this mistake.  

After meeting my friends for lunch, I filled up my gas tank, and arrived at the hotel.  They had sent me a text saying that my check in time was 4:30 p.m.  I checked in right on time, then followed the map to find the building my room was in, and a parking space.  

I couldn't find a parking spot.  The available ones were all handicapped.  It was packed, being a convention weekend.  I  had asked if someone at the reservation counter could help me, and the man there said that he couldn't leave his desk.  My ticket was for a 6:30 p.m. performance of Follies at the Aliante, which was fifty miles north of the hotel.

Realizing that things were not working out, I reversed the car, and  headed back home to my cabin in Wrightwood.  I made arrangements to text my girlfriend when I arrived home safely.  The next morning, I phoned the Tahiti Village Resort, and explained what had happened.  A supervisor named Linda phoned me back, and assured me that she would issue me a refund.  "Next time you stay here, ask for a room near the front desk or the elevator," she advised.  She also said to call Expedia and have them contact the supervisor, so she could verify that my story was true.  They would issue the refund, since it was a third-party reservation.  

A few days later, I received a credit for my resort fee, tax, and room.  It amounted to a large sum of money, and I really appreciated their suggestion for the future room location and their understanding.

I had been hoping to take a bath, get made up, and maybe swim at the pool in the afternoon.  Some hotels will allow you to check in early, if the room is ready.  It's worth asking.  Others will let you store your bags behind the desk while you use the facilities.  

Things take longer as we get older, and it's a good idea to allow a few extra hours of time, in case there is an issue, an accident, or something unexpected.  I missed the show, but got to see my friends.

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