A Day Trip To The Mountains

There's something about the feeling  of being in the mountains that has always uplifted me. The pine trees, fresh air, and blue skies all make me feel happy and hopeful. Today I took my German Shepherd for a gorgeous drive and hike up in Frasier Park. The views were incredible. I had a light backpack and brought along a cheese sandwich, plenty of water, and my camera. We drove up to Frasier Mountain, and parked at the trailhead. I was glad that I had my Adventure Pass, and hung it on the rearview mirror of my car.

Years ago, when  I worked at the  MGM Grand Hotel in Reno, Nevada, I fell in love with the setting. Reno is a small city surrounded by mountains. After I got hired in Las Vegas at the audition, I packed up my convertible bug to start my first professional show as a dancer. I was so excited. I drove through the Sierra Nevadas from San Francisco. It was about a four and a half hour trip. The scenery was some of the most beautiful I had ever seen. Once I was in the show, my friends and I  used to head up to Lake Tahoe on our night off now and then, for dinner and to see a show. It was such a spectacular location. I'll never forget it. Many of the dancers that I worked with at MGM  Reno, Nevada also used to ski at Tahoe regularly. They would rave about the wonderful time that they had, rising early in the morning to make the trip. After skiing all day, they would drive down the mountain, which took two and a half hours,  all the way home. They were back to the Ziegfeld Theater in time to dance through two shows, one at 8:00 p.m. and with a second  show at midnight.  We were all young, excited to be working as professional dancers, and we had the energy. It was a dream job. Years later I got to perform in the show Sugar Babies at Harrah's in Lake Tahoe. That was unforgettable. Juliet Prowse and Rip Taylor were the stars. I rented a gorgeous house on the lake, with a stunning view. It was so peaceful and relaxed. I can't think of a more heavenly place.

These days I take day trips up to the mountains near my home. After our hike this morning, we drove through a quaint little neighborhood with small houses up on the hills. There is something so charming about homes in the mountains. I love the steep hills, and the rockiness of the streets. The poppies were in bloom, and they looked so cheerful.  You can just feel the energy. It reminds me of the movie Heidi, which I always loved as a child.

Some people dream of living by the ocean. For me, my first choice is being in the mountains. They just exude something special and healing. How about you?           

The Joy of Soap Making

Several years ago, I ordered a book on soap making. I was eager to get started and try it. As I read through the recipes and stories, I began feeling a little nervous. There were so many warnings about the lye. Also, none of the recipes had measurements in cups; everything was in ounces or grams. You needed to buy a kitchen scale and weigh the ingredients. That put me off, too. I wasn't sure how to use a digital scale, and I was afraid I wouldn't understand it. Did you weigh the measuring cup first, and then add the liquid? It all seemed very intimidating. I put the book away for years. A couple years later I picked it up again  and spent hours and hours  researching soap making on line.

In the meantime, I had decided to try making melt and pour soap. That sounded simple, and very safe. I had ordered a soap making starter kit from Brambleberry, so I already had some soap molds and fragrance oils. I had purchased their starter pack on line. It had several different types of melt and pour soap: goat's milk, shea butter, glycerine, aloe vera, and a clear variety. It was really easy and fun. Maybe too easy. All you did was cut up the block of soap mixture into cubes, melt it over low heat on the stove, and then add the fragrance. I poured it into the molds, feeling happy to finally be using them. The soap was hard and ready to use within an hour or two.

I was excited about these soaps, but they weren't exactly what I wanted. I had been ordering some wonderful cold processed soaps on line from a farm in Indiana. These were really lovely soaps. They just felt divine. I wanted to work up the courage to make my own at home, but I was afraid. Having to wear goggles, gloves, long sleeves, and shoes intimidated me. I couldn't even see well enough to read the recipe through the goggles. The printing  was all blurry. That seemed even more dangerous. All of the books said that you needed to have lots of ventilation and that no pets should be around the soap making area. I'd think about it and then start procrastinating again. I invented all sorts of excuses.

A couple years later I still had my soap making kit sitting in the kitchen cupboard. When we would talk on the phone my mother would ask me, "Why don't you make soap?" I'd explain to her how complicated it all sounded, and that I was afraid of burning myself with the lye. It was easier for me to just order it on line from the lady with the goat farm in Indiana. I did that for a couple of years, rationalizing that I was supporting her business, and that I was busy teaching my ballet and yoga classes,  anyway.

Finally, I got up the nerve and made my own soap at home. It was the most exciting experience! It was much easier than I had expected. It felt so good to use all of the oils that I had ordered, instead of feeling guilty for letting them sit in the cupboard. I did some research on line, and found some great support from women on soap making and simple living forums.

I was so happy with the result that I became a soap maker and opened an Etsy shop. The lather, the smell, and the texture of hand made soap just thrilled me. It was such a luxury, and now I had nice gifts that I could give to people. When I was a dance teacher I had always stressed out about buying Christmas presents. I didn't really have the money for extras. With soap, I can make it months in advance, and it's always well received. Everybody uses it. Even now, I still look forward to my daily bath or shower so that I can enjoy a bar of goat's milk, shea butter, or olive oil  homemade soap. It's like a decadent dessert.

How about you? Do you make soap? 

        

The Energizing Effect of Hiking

Now that I have had my hips replaced, I am thrilled that I can enjoy hiking again. It's so nice to be pain free and to have a healthy gait. These are all things that I used to take for granted, but not anymore. Before my surgery I had an embarrassing limp that I couldn't correct. I had this strange, jerky,  hoppity skippity movement with each step. I avoided walking in front of people, because I didn't want them to see me. My surgeon told me that after the surgery I wouldn't be bent forward when I was walked anymore. He was right. Now people tell me that they can't even tell that I've had both hips replaced. That's music to my ears. 

I live in an area that is close to some wonderful hiking trails. A few times a week I take one of my dogs in the car, and we get out in nature on a hike. The other dog stays home as a watchdog. They seem to understand that they have to take turns. There are so many beautiful canyons and mountains nearby. I love to explore them.

I've always felt a strong connection to nature. When I was a little girls, I used to go to Vacation Bible School each day with my best friend during the summer. We would meet in the church parking lot, and drive out to a state park in Northern California. The camp counselors would lead us on a hike down the trail to a wooded campground. We would spend the day there, enjoying a packed lunch, reading, singing, and absorbing the essence of nature. It was so good for us kids. It felt so healthy and grounding. In that area, the redwood trees were just gorgeous. The power was so strong. We all came home feeling centered, happy, and tired. It was so healthy.

I notice hiking has the same effect on my dogs. They respond so well to the time in nature. Something about the trees, the earth, the streams, and the quiet makes them seem more relaxed and  peaceful. I generally just hike them for an hour or ninety minutes. Since we are all getting older, I don't push our bodies as hard as I did when I was young. I try to find a balance so that we are staying strong. This way I still have the energy to do the work that needs doing once I'm home. 

How about you? Do you enjoy hiking?

Using Public Transportation and a Bicycle

I live in an area that has excellent public transportation. My cottage is a few blocks from the bus stop, and the buses run hourly. It's very convenient to hop on my bicycle, put the bike on the front bike rack of the bus, and take the bus in to town to run errands. Everything I need is just a few miles away. It's so convenient. I would probably ride my bicycle to the library, post office, and shops, but the highway I would have to take is too busy. It feels dangerous for pedestrians and bicyclists to me. The speed limit is 50 mph. So, I take the bus about five miles, and then use the bike paths to explore. We have over three hundred miles of bike paths where I live. Many of them are completely car free. They are limited to cyclists and pedestrians. It's nice to meander through the back areas that you don't see while driving. It's quiet and peaceful.

Yesterday I rode to Sprouts to pick up some fresh fruit. I stopped at the library to return my books on the way home. I use a backpack or bike trailer to carry what I buy. That leaves my hands free to steer, and makes it easier to balance. A lot of people smile at me from their cars as I ride by them. I must look kind of comical to them. I glide by on my one speed  beach cruiser wearing a bike helmet, a flowing sun dress, and sandals. The kids really seem to like it. Their faces always light up when I see them. I'm the same age as their grandmas.  It's ideal weather right now for riding. Not to hot, but still sunny and breezy.

Our train station is also just a few miles from my home. When I travel by Amtrak to visit family, I take the local bus stop a few miles, and then transfer to the Metro North. That takes me to Union Station, where I can travel by train to just about anywhere. For me, train travel is the ultimate luxury. The scenery, meals, sleeper cars, and slow pace all appeal to me. Trains  are an ideal place to knit, read, or write. Ours offer $10.00 day passes on the weekends.  It's fascinating to gaze into people's backyards as the train rolls by each of the neighborhoods. I just love it.    

Two Salads A Day

When I was a little girl, my mother made a salad every night for dinner. We usually had it with meat and potatoes. Sometimes she'd make a casserole with artichokes or asparagus. She was an excellent cook. In those days, our salad consisted of iceberg lettuce, sliced tomatoes, chopped green onions, and cut up avocado. We used to buy Good Season Italian dressing spice packets at Safeway. I would cut open the envelope of herbs, and  mix it with red wine vinegar and salad oil. We had a special carafe that had the measurement lines written on the glass. It was easy, (even for a little girl) to follow the directions. I loved it. My mom always had me help her in the kitchen. I learned to cook by working alongside her and watching what she did.

Everyone in our family would have a small plate of salad, and then I would usually eat what was left. That meant I had two or three helpings, every night. I just loved the freshness of it. I could feel how healthy it was to eat raw vegetables. I liked the way it tasted once it had been sitting on the table for a while. It seemed like the lettuce would absorb the flavors of the oil, vinegar, and spices.

Now that I have my own home, I still make daily salads. I've changed the ingredients a bit. Tonight I made a spinach salad with fresh spinach, grated carrots, chopped orange bell pepper, sliced avocado, chopped green onions,  cut up radishes, fresh cilantro leaves, cubed tomatoes, fresh pressed garlic, and grated cheddar cheese.

I made the dressing fresh, over the bowl. I measured some olive oil into the wooden spoon, and tossed the leaves with freshly pressed garlic until they were coated. I stirred in some sea salt and balsamic vinegar into the spoon, and drizzled that over the top. I sprinkled oregano, tarragon, basil, and dill over the top of the leaves. Freshly ground pepper tastes delicious as a seasoning, too.

Now that I'm older, I make an effort to eat two salads a day. I usually have one in the afternoon, with my lunch. Most of the time I eat leftovers from dinner  for lunch. Today it was tuna casserole. Dinner will be a second salad, which was already made this afternoon. I prefer to eat lightly at night. Since I make one large bowl, I don't have to worry about making a second salad at dinner time.  Sometimes I will have a baked potato or homemade bread with my meal. Tonight I had some homemade pizza dough that I baked in the toaster oven with melted butter and fresh garlic. It made a nice, chewy flat bread. It only took a few minutes to prepare, and it cost next to nothing. Delicious! It would also be good with grated fresh parmesan cheese.    

The Backyard Orchard

When I was a child, we used to visit a beautiful old ranch. It was owned collectively by several members of my dad's side of the family. There were acres and acres of apricot, pear, and walnut trees. That was my first experience ever seeing fruit on a tree. I didn't realize that was how it grew. I found the concept absolutely fascinating. I decided then and there that when I grew up, I would have my own house and that I would plant my own fruit trees. I visualized in my mind how it would feel to pick fresh fruit off of trees right on the property. To me it was a huge dream. Most of the people where I grew up had expansive lawns in their backyards. That's what we had, that, and a jungle gym. We could play on the bars and practice cartwheels. It looked nothing like an orchard.

When I first moved into my cottage, I began planting fruit trees in the backyard. The soil was fine, like sand. It was almost white, and it needed a lot of help. I started a compost pile, and began collecting leaves, manure, and large, heavy bags of used coffee grounds from Starbucks. I would rake up leaves for my neighbors in exchange for taking them home. I piled everything together. One woman let me take as much horse and goat manure as I wanted. I knew that manure was gold for composting! I gave her some of my homemade soap as a thank you. I added all of my fruit and vegetable scraps to the pile. (I eat a lot of fruits and vegetables, so I had a nice mixture of trimmings.)  I placed the finished compost in the planting holes, and mulched the entire backyard with straw.

I planted several different fruit trees. Because I live in an area that has very hot summers, not every tree survived. The citrus trees and pomegranate bush have been the healthiest. They have made it through a severe drought, and have been very consistent in bearing fruit. It's a pleasure for me to have freshly squeezed orange juice on a regular basis. An orange off of the tree tastes entirely different than one that's bought at the grocery store. The flavor is so fresh and delicious. Citrus fruits also make wonderful cakes and icings.

One of my favorite trees is the Hachiya persimmon tree. It's been very productive. This year I am a little worried about it, but for the past several seasons it has provided me with an abundance of fruit. Persimmon pulp freezes well, and it makes delicious breads and cookies. I enjoy eating them fresh, too, right off of the tree. They are very sweet and exotic tasting.

Growing fruit has been one of the most rewarding things I have experienced as a home owner. I have spent a lot of money on fruit, especially during the summertime. It's so refreshing and satisfying. Growing my own saves me money. It's also nice to have to give to neighbors and friends. Many people really appreciate home grown produce. It doesn't have any sprays, waxes, or bruises. Do you grow any fruits where you live? 

Planting a Front Garden

When I first moved into this cottage, it was as a renter. The house had been vacant for two years, and the yard was overgrown with brown weeds and Bermuda grass. "I don't have a gardener," the owner explained to me. It was going to be up to me to clean up and create something with this yard. I was teaching fifteen classes a week at the time, and driving all over creation to get to the different dance studios where I worked.

I read about lasagna gardening on the Soil, Compost, and Mulch Forum at Gardenweb. The soil in my front yard turned out to be clay. I knew that plants wouldn't grow here unless I amended it. I put layers of manure, straw, and Starbucks coffee grounds. I spread it all on top of the dead Bermuda grass. The technique worked, and when I dug into the mulch in the spring, I had nice, rich, dark soil. I was in business!

The first thing I did was to divide all of the irises. There were dozens of purple ones, and they looked gorgeous in bloom. There were also some daffodils planted in clumps, which I really liked. I added a couple hanging baskets of geraniums on the porch, and put some annuals in the window boxes. All of a sudden I had color, beauty, and variety. I planted a couple of conifers, and had them flank the front door. I thought they would make nice live Christmas trees at holiday time. It has worked out really well. They are so festive when decorated with colored lights. I love the look. It's simple and bright.

Hollyhocks have always been one my favorite old fashioned flowers. There were already lots of them growing wild all over the backyard when I moved here. I saved the seeds and planted some in the front, too. Sunflowers were another one that I was able to grow from seed, as well as four o'clocks.

I had some California poppies spring up in front of the mailbox. They looked so cheerful that I saved the seeds. Each year I sprinkle them in the same area. It's always fun to see them come back, year after year. Several people have commented on them. They are so easy to grow. Some neighbors gave me cuttings of dusty miller, red geraniums, and a starter aloe vera plant. Once people see that you are an avid gardener, they are often eager to share their plants with you.   

I now own this little cottage, and the front garden is one of my favorite aspects of it. It's like an outdoor room. I spend so much time on the old fashioned porch:

knitting, reading, writing, and communing with nature. The garden has made it a real special place. It just vibrates with health and beauty.

Getting Up the Courage to See the Doctor or Dentist

Until recently, I was a terrible procrastinator when it came to making doctors' appointments. I would wait and see, hoping that I could cure whatever was wrong with me through diet, yoga, or rest. Sometimes it worked, sometimes it didn't. I was big into the self healing movement.

 As children, my mother used to take us to the doctor as soon as we had any symptoms or pain. "Why do we always have to run to the doctor?" my father would ask. "Just wait a few days," was his advice. That approach always made sense to me. I thought it was kind of funny the way  he called it "running to the doctor." He felt the same way about taking the dog to the vet. Quite often, our dog would get better on his own. Sometimes it seemed like he would limp on purpose, for attention. It was like a trick. We would all make a big deal over him and he liked the sympathy. I saw the parallel with people.

I always  liked the folk remedies. I still do. Gargling with warm salt water for a sore throat is one of my favorites. I am amazed at the power of salt. Rinsing with heated salt water after having dental work  gives such immediate relief. You feel an instant sensation of healing in the gums. No wonder salt was so valuable in ancient times.

At some point in my life I really took the do it yourself method  too far. One example was not seeing a dentist out of fear. I had experienced a lot of trauma in the dentist's chair as a child. As an adult, I became very avoidant.  It backfired. By the time I would finally visit  the dentist, I  needed a root canal or a crown. It was always expensive, especially for a dance teacher. Since several years had passed,  it usually  involved weeks of appointments to fix numerous cavities. It was also embarrassing. Once I discovered a preventive program by Dr. Ellie, I began to enjoy going to the dentist. Her system of using zylitol and mouth rinses completely changed my life. Now I rarely get cavities and I go to the dentist at least once a year. It's such a relief to be out of that cycle of fear and dread.

As I've gotten older, I've made a conscious choice to take the reins. I address health problems while they are a whisper, instead of waiting until my body is screaming at me for relief.  By the time I saw a doctor about my hips, they were bone on bone and had reached the stage of deformity. In retrospect, I see how sad it was that I waited until my joints were so painful and damaged. Now that I have new, pain free hips, I really want to take care of them. I never knew it was possible for my hips to feel so good. It's just incredible.

The other day I had an earache. I am normally perfectly healthy. I have always been very fortunate that way. I rarely, if ever, "catch" colds or the flu. I waited a few days, but it didn't improve, (in spite of my salt water gargling and eating fresh garlic.) I went to see the doctor. He diagnosed it as swimmer's ear. He prescribed ear drops and antibiotics. Since artificial joints can't fight infection, I have a lot at risk. I am very protective of these hips, and they've made me more responsible.   

The doctor asked me if I had been swimming. I had been working out and doing hydrotherapy at my local gym. I probably contacted it in the jacuzzi. It's ironic, because I've always loved water therapy. I guess being in other people's water is not the greatest idea. You never know what kind of bacteria is lurking in the pool or the hot tub. One can only imagine...

A simple thing that  I've learned as I've gotten older is that it's better to find out what's wrong right away  than to wait. I used to pretend that the symptoms I had weren't there. I tried to heal osteoarthritis with exercise. I was in denial. We are fortunate to live in an age where we have so many solutions and medical advancements. Although I try to cure most things with diet, garlic, and herbs, sometimes a professional is really what's needed.       

Changing How You Work Out As You Get Older

Recently while practicing the standing poses from the Bikram Yoga series, I noticed that I was having a strange sensation in the backs of my thighs and buttocks after releasing from the poses. At first it just felt uncomfortable, and it would disappear quickly. I had never been aware of those muscles before, though. I wondered if it had to do with the titanium stem in my femur bones. I asked another professional dancer who also has had both of her hips replaced. I wondered  if she had ever felt that feeling. She told me that she did a lot of work to rebuild the muscles in the backs of her thighs and her buttocks after both of her surgeries. That is exactly where I felt it. Another dancer chimed in, telling me that he had done extensive physical therapy after having a surgery for a labral tear. As dancers, we are trained to do exercises or stretches to heal our discomfort.

I went over mentally when it felt this way. It was when I was bent over, digging fruit and vegetable scraps into my compost pile. I analyzed the position. Something about bending down and bending over at the same time caused intense discomfort in the backs of the thighs. I would reach back and put my hands on them. It was always when I stood up after forward bending poses in yoga, too. After reading about a man on the hip replacement forum who had the same issue, I decided to stop doing the movements that aggravated it. It seems obvious, but as dancers, many of us just continue to exercise through pain. And now, when I did those same yoga poses, the reaction was more severe, it hurt. It felt like a warning.

I did some of my own research on the Internet. One man said that's what had happened before he had dislocated his hip after total hip replacement surgery. "Oh my God," I thought. There's no point in even risking that. I had heard the horror stories. I went back to doing simpler yoga, basic Pilates, bike rides, and walks. I'd had an excellent recovery, and I didn't want to do anything now that would cause problems down the road. It has been almost two years since the surgery, and I can't put a price on being free from pain.

I started to think back to what I had been doing in the past month. I'd been adding things in ballet class that I probably shouldn't have: pique turns, pirouettes, balances in the center on releve on one leg, etc. I started to think about the construction of what was now inside my leg and hip joint. It's probably better to be conservative than to take chances, I thought. The music, the choreography, and the endorphins had been influencing me. I wanted to do more, but I really should be doing less.

I did some more on line research, and found that when people need revisions for implant failure, that is one of the signs. It usually happen with people who are young, very active, and who have uncemented stems.I fit the profile.  That was enough to scare the daylights out of me. Fortunately, I had caught what triggered it early, and could make changes. In the old days they wouldn't give a hip replacement to a patient until they were in their seventies. People had to wait, regardless of how much pain they were experiencing.

I decided to be grateful for all the things I can now do and enjoy them. Right after the surgery, I had confided to a friend of mine, "I'm really glad I had the operation, but I don't want to do it again." She was a principal dancer in a major ballet company. She agreed with me, and urged me to do things that were gentle. At the time I told her that I couldn't believe how many people went back to ballet class after having hips replaced. I thought they were crazy. Now I get it. It's such a part of your identity, and it feels good to look and feel in shape. But, at what cost? I realized. It was time to scale back, plan for the future, and to make wise choices.   


I decided to think long term. Where do I want to be in thirty years?  I could take advantage of the time I had now to read, write, hike in nature, run my soap making business, and take care of my home. I want these hips to last as long as possible. It's up to me to take care of them and not overdo.     

Age and the Dancer

One thing that I was never prepared for as a dancer was dealing with aging. Dancing keeps you young, and in my early forties I was very happy with my looks. I thought that as long as I stayed in shape, I would probably look the same.  Once I hit forty seven, however, I felt like I was slammed with challenges. All of a sudden I had decreased range of motion in my hip joints, (down to 20%). I also experienced  extreme stiffness, and I had trouble sleeping. At the time, I thought it was the aging process. Now, in retrospect, I see that it was osteoarthritis, which is very common in professional dancers. It progressed at an alarming rate. Since healing from my bilateral hip replacement surgery, I feel thirty years younger. My range of motion is much better. I no longer feel stiff or have aches and pains. I am able to easily sleep through the night. Many of my dancer friends had told me that they were pain free after their hip replacements. I found it hard to believe, but it has become true for me, as well.

In the rest of my life, several things had  hit me at once. My brother had suffered a massive stroke at 49 and had died. This was a shock to the entire family. He had always been athletic, handsome, and fit. He looked like he was in his mid thirties until the end. It's strange when someone dies, and they don't get old. He never looked wrinkled or elderly. We would always remember him young, like Princess Diana. A couple of years later, my mother died, after living for many years with health problems. I was prepared for her death, but it was still traumatic. Because she had been in pain before she died, I was relieved that she was no longer suffering. Still, I missed her, because we were close. The third whammie for me was finally seeing an orthopedic surgeon and finding out that I needed to have both hips replaced. Although both hips were bone on bone,  I had been in denial for years. My mother had been telling me that it was arthritis, but I didn't want to believe her. I thought I was too young for such an "old lady" disease. She was right.

Going through menopause was a learning experience. I was fortunate in that I didn't suffer from hot flashes or weight gain. I did notice a big difference in my skin, hair, and face after age fifty, though. I used to look at some of the over fifty female female choreographers I knew when I was young, and wonder why their hair was so wild and messy. Now I understood, because mine looked the same way. It had become  much dryer and stiffer than it was when I was younger. It also was becoming very, very grey. I continued to use henna, because when I would let the roots grow out, I felt like a hag. I just couldn't do it. I felt like I looked like I was in my seventies with grey hair. Some people could pull it off, especially men. For some reason, a lot of the guys I know look terrific with silver hair. My friend told me about a powder you can buy on Amazon to cover your roots. It's called Wow. I bought a box, and loved it.  I found that  had to leave the henna treatment on for four hours to cover the grey. It did the job, though. 

The thing that really surprised me was the drop in libido. I did some research, and wondered if it was low estrogen. I had friends who were on hormone replacement therapy, but that really wasn't what I wanted. I went back to practicing Kundalini Yoga, and that was an instant fix. Kundalini Yoga moves the energy from the base of the spine up to the top of the head. It gives a radiance to the skin and face, and really makes a person glow. I have been working on a set called Awakening the Ten Bodies of Light. I am amazed at the benefits and changes I feel. I like it because it is natural. Certain foods can really help, too. Some of my favorites are pineapple, beets, garlic, onions, and chili peppers. They act as natural aphrodisiacs.

I also noticed my eyesight becoming weaker, and my memory was suffering. I bought some reading glasses, and they did the trick for my eyes. As far as my memory, I realized that I could still take ballet classes, but that putting myself in a professional level class was really causing WAY too much stress. I would feel anxious about remembering the combinations, and sometimes I would blank out or make errors. It was very unlike me. I used to be a quick study. But, it was happening. I started taking classes that were not as advanced, and began to enjoy ballet again. You respond differently to stress as you get older, and in my case, I no longer put myself in situations that make me feel jumpy or upset. When I was younger I would  push myself very hard. I  forced myself  to learn all sorts of styles and methods quickly. Now I work more methodically and enjoy it. There's no rush. I don't have to hurry or force it. It's a relief  not be so stressed.  

    

Spending Time in Nature

Spending time in nature changes the way that we feel. When I first bought my vintage cottage, it had been empty for two years. It was surrounded by tall, flowering weeds and Bermuda grass. The front of the house  looked neglected and dilapidated. In my mind's eye, however, I saw potential. I wanted to transform it into a fairy tale cottage like the ones I had seen when visiting Carmel. They had made a vivid impression on me. What stood out to me about those little houses were the gorgeous front gardens. They were lush, healthy, and  individual works of art. People had all kinds of flowers in bloom. The feeling that you got as you walked by was so energizing and healing. They radiated pure beauty, and it took my breath away.

My first challenge here was to get rid of all of the devil grass, or Bermuda.  I researched a method called lasagna gardening, and used it to suffocate the weeds. I covered the yard with a layer of straw, followed by a layer of manure, and then a layer of wood chips. The soil improved as the sheet mulch broke down and fed the Earth. Instead of planting a lawn, I put in a cottage garden. I planted old fashioned flowers like hollyhocks, larkspur, geraniums, and lilies. I added some herbs, roses, window boxes, and hanging baskets. It really created a peaceful and healing atmosphere. I spend time every morning sitting out there with my dogs, a cup of coffee, and my knitting.  We watch the alpacas that live up on the hill across the street, and listen to the roosters crowing. I love the sound of the hens clucking excitedly as they lay their eggs. In June, I plant giant pumpkins, which give the garden a storybook feel. I have several old trees on my property, and they provide a lot of oxygen, greenery, and shade. They also help to keep the house cool.  

Anytime I am feeling off balance, negative, or not myself, I go outside and sit on the front porch. The air feels fresher out there. It's cool, soothing, and quiet. I can hear the birds in the trees singing, and the neighbor's goats down the street bleating. I am instantly connected to Mother Nature and her healing powers. Spending time in nature is free, and it's priceless. It helps to put us in sync with plants, animals, and our spiritual selves.

The Company You Keep

Spending time with people we enjoy makes a huge difference in how we feel. People who are upbeat, friendly, and kind radiate a special  attractiveness and appeal. They are a pleasure to be around, and they create positive energy wherever they go.

When I was a teenager I met a  teacher at a ballet seminar who had a very buoyant energy field. She was so inspiring, and her enthusiasm uplifted all of us. When I was struggling to grasp the petite allegro, she gave me some valuable advice. "Stephenie, I want to you to sing to yourself during this combination," she told me quietly. "I love to jump. I love to jump," she sang to the melody that the pianist had played. I tried it, and it worked. Suddenly I had the combination, and I  developed the coordination. She showed me how to make it easy. I felt an instant sense of relief and gained confidence. My ability soared with her simple advice.

Teachers who are positive have great self discipline. They make a choice to focus on what they want, not on what they don't want. They are able to explain the details of what you need to do to make things require less effort. They can see your blocks, and they know how to remove them. They've been there, and they know what works.

My Aunt Mary was a person who always lifted my spirits when she walked into the room. She was a very funny, positive, and warm person. She remained single her whole life, and she didn't have any children. She was extremely generous to all of her nieces and nephews, and we adored her. She would bring us really fun gifts like candy cigarettes. (She was a passionate smoker.) We thought it was so hysterical to have a smoke with her. I still remember how pink they were, and how sweet they tasted.  I used to love to fix her a bourbon and ginger ale, and then light her cigarette. I was in my glory. Sometimes she bought us bags of chocolate coins. Her clever gifts were always things that we never got at home. They weren't expensive, but they were very humorous and creative. When we would visit at her house she would have a paint by number set for me, and a few model airplanes for my three brothers. It was so much fun to go to her home. She was a terrific cook, and she made delicious meals. Each visit with her was a celebration.

Aunt Mary always had an exciting trip planned, which she would look forward to for months. She would flip through the brochures from the cruise companies and talk about her next voyage to Alaska, or the Panama Canal. She would take my mother, to give her a break from raising four kids. My mother was ecstatic. Nobody else's mother in our neighborhood went on vacation from their family, but it really seemed to help my mom.

Each year Mary  bought season tickets to see the Broadway shows that were playing in San Francisco. She  got extras so that my mother and I could join her.  It was because of her that I chose the career path that I did. After seeing A Chorus Line, I knew that was what I wanted to do. I wanted to dance in Broadway shows.

When I think of the type of person I would like to be, I think of my aunt. She radiated a spirit of generosity and an enthusiasm for life.     

Eating Sensibly

When I was eighteen, I rented a room from a former ballerina who had danced with The Royal Ballet in London. Her name was  Rosemary Valaire. She was a very famous ballet teacher and coach in Santa Monica, California. I loved taking her classes and watching her teach. Her close friend, (the director of the ballet school,) Yvonne Mounsey, jokingly referred to her as "the sage of Mar Vista." She was a very wise and accomplished woman. Just being in her presence made me feel spiritual and hopeful. She had worked with many famous dancers and was highly respected in the ballet world. She and Yvonne were turning out a large percentage of professional dancers my age.  I liked being around her. It was exciting.

At that time of my life I was starting to become concerned about my weight. I had always been lean. I had a dancer's body, thanks to my gymnastics and early Cecchetti training. Once in LA, I took a part time job to pay for my classes and expenses. After I started working at Mac Donald's and eating their free food, I began to get  a little heavier. I remember catching a glimpse of my reflection in the large glass windows outside the studio and thinking, "Is that my butt?" I was shocked. I had never really had to worry about what I ate. I was getting to that age, however. When living at home, my mom had always been an excellent cook. She used to make dinner early, at about 3:00 p.m.   That way I could eat a large meal before I went in to the studio each afternoon. I assisted the children's classes, and then took my own classes  until 9:00 p.m. My dad would save me a second helping to have once I got home, which I really appreciated. It was always on the stove when I walked in the door. Everyone else was in bed, and the house was dark.  I loved her cooking. It was delicious and nourishing. I was fortunate that we had good quality meals: either meat or chicken, potatoes, and salad. She also made several delicious casseroles.   

Once I moved in with Rosemary, I had a whole new experience in the kitchen. Rosemary made a large salad every night, with homemade Italian dressing. I loved the fresh garlic that she pressed into the wooden salad bowl with her garlic press. I had never seen one before. She sprinkled the herbs on top of the salad  before serving it. It felt very European to me. She had two orange trees growing in her backyard. We were able to pick oranges whenever we wanted, and we could have freshly squeezed orange juice for breakfast. I was enamored with the whole scenario, and vowed that I would have my own citrus trees when I grew up and bought my own home.  

Rosemary taught me not to diet, but to eat sensibly. We ate a lot of fresh fruits and vegetables, and she brewed delicious French Roast coffee every morning. She liked her coffee very hot. She ground her own beans that she bought at the Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf. She would heat the milk on the stove,and reheat the coffee after it had run through her Melita drip grinder. She placed everything on a fancy tray, and  and then would strain the milk through a small sterling silver strainer. I found the whole ritual fascinating. She had flourless whole wheat toast every morning. A few times a week she would scramble eggs, which were brown. We had always bought white eggs at our house. I thought the brown ones were prettier. She was a great example of a healthy and reasonable eater.

She explained to me that if you just eat sensibly, you don't need to diet. She bought delicious nut breads at Trader Joe's, and would have a slice of those as a treat with her coffee. She taught me how to make an apple pie with a homemade crust. She used butter, whole wheat pastry flour, and she made a lattice top. Her rolling pin was made of grey marble. Ours growing up was wooden. I thought hers was just gorgeous. The pie was delicious. I was very enthusiastic about learning her recipes. "You're a good cook," she told me. That just sent me. My mom had taught me well. If Rosemary asked me to make a white sauce when I helped her in the kitchen, I knew what to do. She would nod at me approvingly. 

Thanks to Rosemary and my mom, I never had to diet. Rosemary told me to stop eating "that MacDonalds," and she wouldn't allow it in the house. We didn't eat any garbage there. I kept up the habits I learned with her, and found it easy and natural to stay slim. Eventually I bought my own cottage in Los Angeles, and one of the first things I did was to plant fruit trees. When I got my first show and moved out of her house, she presented me with my own marble rolling pin. I think it was from Williams Sonoma. I showed it to my mom and she was very impressed. Now whenever I have a glass of freshly squeezed orange juice, I think of her.